The Momma Mentor
By Nea Cowan
When I think of a mentor, one person comes to mind. She has been the person I have looked up to since day one (literally). The support she has shown me through the hard times, to the cheers she has cheered during the great – she has been my constant. She modeled what it means to be a first class, number one mother . . . and I am so fortunate to say that she is mine.
My mom has always been there for me. Her endless love and support throughout my life helped me to become the woman I am today. I am so thankful that I have a mother who showed me what it truly means to be a parent. It means being the “bad guy,” the “keeper of the kisses,” and the “mama bear” all wrapped up in one formidable package. I take great pride in my role as a mother, and thankfully, I had a great one to show me the way.
When my daughter was diagnosed with profound hearing loss, my world was turned end over end. I was a frightened, overwhelmed and very emotional first-time mom facing a tunnel of uncertainty. My mom came to every appointment I asked her to attend, no questions asked. She is there as a supporter and grandmother, nothing more, nothing less. The love she has shown my family by respecting our decision has been a constant safe place of support. She has modeled the perfect balance of involvement while respecting boundaries, something I pray I am able to do for my daughter. Her constant support has given us confidence and strength to continue this journey with our sweet daughter serving as our tour guide leading the way.
My mother has always been my “go to” person when I am upset. Even when it is the most menial of issues, she truly listens and tries to help turn the situation into a positive. That type of compassion and understanding became an example of how to be a genuinely open and caring ear for the families I serve as a H&V Parent Guide. My families know that they can reach out any time over anything; I will always be there with an open ear and heart. My mother taught me that sometimes all you need is someone to listen and care, the rest will sort itself out. My mom has always been my safe place, and I try to be that for my families as well; a welcome place where there is no judgment, only support and love.
Throughout this journey I have been able to gain confidence with the knowledge that she fully trusts and believes that I can handle whatever comes our way with a lot of heart and even more research. I hope the families I serve can gain that same confidence. I try to maintain the safety of support while empowering parents to do what they need to do. The growth my mother has continually been able to facilitate, all while not leaving me feeling alone in this world, has been instrumental in my development as not only a mother, not only a Guide, but as a person as well.
Her selflessness has never lessened as time has passed. When she married in 2018, she and her husband asked for donations to benefit our local Hands & Voices chapter My mother tries to attend almost every event, even when it’s over three hours away. She can’t be around to be part of my daughter’s daily life, but she makes sure that the days she can be around are full and meaningful. The families I work with as a Guide truly become part of my heart and life. Even though we cannot meet daily (drats!), we always make the days we are together worthwhile.
A mentor does so much more than “show you the ropes” in order to complete a job. A true mentor instills in you the skills needed so you can be successful above and beyond your wildest expectations. A mentor doesn’t have to be the CEO of a company in order to aid you in growth. Growth isn’t only found in promotions. Your mentor will listen to dreams while supporting you to make them reality. In my mind, a mentor is the person who aids in bringing out the best “you” that you can be . . . and my mom has always been able to see that woman in me.
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Nea Cowan is a Parent Guide serving the Owensboro and western Kentucky areas.